This is but a small glimpse into my current state of hell. Halloween season (which I wholeheartedly adore) is the absolute WORST time of year for me, diet-wise. All of the most damaging forms of my very favorite chocolate products come in these cute, deceptive little "fun sizes", but in sacs of like a thousand of them, filling the most prominent aisle of the store from floor to ceiling. "I'll just have a few, it's just a little bit, only such a small serving" I keep thinking to myself... Until by the end of the day there are like 50 wrappers in my purse and I might throw up if I try to fit in dinner. And forget about candy corn, that might as well be straight crack. Not to mention that eating this much sugar makes me feel terrrrrrrrrrible, sapping my energy like a parasite draining its host, making my biggest pants tighter, making me want to sleep under my desk at various points during the day, etc. And I know it going in, too- reaching for the first sampling of the day, I think to myself for just a second "I'm going to feel crappy if I eat this", and then I promptly eat it anyway- and then I definitely do. Sigh...
With all these new and revived fitness aspirations brewing, I have to find my way out, immediately. It's too early in October to continue to kill myself for a few more weeks until the shelves clear. There are varying schools of thought out there on how to do it, too, some people believe in the all-or-nothing approach, others think moderation is the only way to be realistic and not feel deprived. Personally, I've always been the all-or-nothing type myself, but most people do preach moderation as the healthier state of mind, which I am really bad at. But I was vindicated yesterday when I asked my doctor about it, bemoaning how poorly my weight was making me feel and that lately it has been exacerbated by the candy problem. She looks like she's never had a weight problem a day in her life, and yet she admitted to me that she "has to pretend she's allergic to chocolate" because like me she can scarcely control the urges to go crazy when exposed to it. Wow!
I've actually been writing this post in bits and pieces for 3 days now, and as of today, I've eaten and given away the last of the candy in the house, especially the ginormous sack of M+Ms that I stuck my coworkers with whilst still imbibing in them myself here and there today. Frankly, I have eaten enough of them now that I actually don't WANT any more, lest I explode, and I feel ready to relax at home for a 3-day weekend of a good start to a healthier path. Piss off, candy, I'm all done with you, for the indefinite future! Let the "rehab" begin, cold turkey...
Anyone else out there suffering from the same plight? Makes me feel less freakish to share. ;)
2 comments:
OMG!!!! Right there with you. Halloween and Easter are the worst holidays for me - all of the "seasonal" candy, and the abundant amounts of fun size candy is torture.
I've tried moderation for years, and for me it never seems to work. I'm slowly coming to believe that I can't eat refined sugar. It's like telling an alcoholic to drink in moderation. Not gonna happen.
Not anymore! I refuse to allow my red light foods in the house and have done so for a couple of years now! However, Halloween time...I love giving the kids treats an then of course, I eat what remains. Well not this year the kids are getting either gift certificates, fun pencils or play-doh! Be strong the candy isle screams...come to me! LOL!
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