Monday, November 9, 2009

All Over the Place

That's where me and my head are at. Had a nice, relaxed weekend, with few obligations. Got the house partly back in order. Ate better. Recognized some ways to fend off the eating trigger feelings, and convinced myself I am done buying Chips Ahoy. Exercised out in the sun and fresh air both days. Got a fair amount of thinking done during those walk-jogs. Have decided that in the future, my discussions about my successes/failures with food and exercise will focus on what I have DONE in a particular day or week, and not just blathering on about what I want or claim to want to do. Having lofty aspirations and concrete deadlines didn't seem to do me any good before.

On the reading front, I read a very, VERY light book as a palate cleanser before tackling Dracula. Because, yes, although I'd punch anyone in the face that called me a Twi-hard, after 2500 pages of the Twilight saga, I admit I felt kind of involved in the story and the characters, and it is a letdown to be done with it. I do agree with my critics that the writing is not particularly stellar (and perhaps got even less so after the first one), but it was hard to argue with the plot, I was riveted. I do want to see the movie(s), but I am quite certain that the visual in my head will look comparably dumb onscreen, especially since I hear the acting is as poor as one would expect from a bunch of rookie teenagers. I made the mistake of trying to read the academic analysis of Dracula first, instead of just skipping past and starting the story, and it was boring as hell. Don't get me wrong, I am as academically capable as I ever was, that's just not what I'm in it for at this point in my life. A little entertaining escape is what I seek in my reading, please.

Wish I could focus myself a little better, though, in general. I am having a bit of an attack of the all or nothings, and I wish I could do it all- FINISH getting the house in order down to every last detail, start again and catch up to now in my scrapbook once and for all, throw myself more fully into exercise, etc. But, I am finding those thoughts to be way too much, and distracting from other important things such as work. The real work, the one that pays the bills. It has picked up suddenly, and left me behind a little. So, the moral of this weekend, is, that doing a decent amount in several areas is healthy, and I can't let my brain rage out of control pining for perfection that doesn't fit into the clock. A holiday Wednesday might allow me a little more house progress, must focus again more fully at the 'ole job tomorrow.

And sometime soon, my demon 4-going-on-16 behaving child will return to the sweet self he usually is and stop sucking the life out of us. :)

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