Tuesday, November 8, 2011

You Can't Be Serious?!

It's November already?  Shut UP!!  Omg, Fall is in full swing, the leaves are gorgeous, it's getting more cold more often, Halloween has come and gone, Thanksgiving is in a little over 2 weeks, and it gets dark at 5:15 and earlier each day.

Shortly before Halloween, I was in my doctor's office, and I got THE CHAT.  The "you have to lose weight" chat, the "you have been steadily gaining weight over the last few years and you hold it around your middle where it is the least healthy and combined with your family history of diabetes and admitted inability to control your sugar intake is fairly indicative of a predisposition for diabetes" chat.  She said I really need to give up sugar and white starches entirely to get it under control.  Clearly, this was the catalyst I've been needing!

So, I gave it my best effort.  Cold turkey, right before Halloween (aka Candy Hell), and the week before starting my cycle, which is a tough one where eating is concerned.  I did it for a solid 6 days before I caved.  I felt truly the effects of it being a detox the first few days, increased fatigue and irritability, the whole bit.  Thing is, rather than getting easier day by day, it got harder.  And when I stepped off the wagon, I assured myself it was only temporary, to quell the madness and to soldier on the next day.  But sugar addiction doesn't work that way, and one day turned into 6 before I knew it.

But moderation has never worked for me, either, so what to do?  I'm by no means giving up, I can't.  This is completely different than wanting lose weight as I always have, this is a doctor I trust telling me something that scares me.  But all my usual excuses keep whispering in my ear, like can't start right before my cycle, can't start right before/during the holidays, too busy, too much going on, etc.  And I need to tell those excuses to shove it, or they will end up killing me eventually.  I am going to figure out how to go as many days as I can with being solid on the right kind of eating before I need a day to relax a little, and then I need to figure out how to do THAT without falling flat on my face and staying there.  There has to be an answer to it.  I will find it.


Melanie said...

Sugar addiction sucks, doesn't it?! I completely understand what you're going through. If you don't eat sugar, eventually it does get easier. It's just getting through that first couple of weeks that's tough. You can do it, though. Don't give up!!!!!

Cat said...

Thanks, Melanie. I am struggling terribly, but I have to keep trying...