Monday, July 11, 2011

It Starts at the Top, and It's Not the Kid's Fault!

It all starts at the top of your body, that is:  your brain.  Being out of sorts is not CAUSED by outside factors in life, per se, unless you have some sort of severe illness, but it is greatly affected by how you manage and process those factors.  For me, this has been my challenge of late.  Recently I’ve been letting myself feel like I am victim to circumstances that are beyond my control, and letting it erode my well-being.  As such, I have gotten into more of a mental rut than usual lately, but happily I am finally now taking the steps to move out from it.  In the bigger picture, this rut has actually been much longer term on some level.  At a physical exam recently, I was discussing with my doctor the fact that I wasn’t at a healthy weight, and that I thought that it was (continuing to) affect my health.  She looked back through her chart, and to my horror, I was still at almost this high of a weight even before I had my son, as far back as 2003.  2003!!  All this time I’ve been blaming getting up to this echelon of weight on motherhood, but the boy wasn’t even born until 2005!  Clearly it is time to stop with the blame game.  My son will turn 6 in August, and apparently I was perfectly heavy already before that.  And isn’t 6 years plenty long enough to adjust to the daily challenges that motherhood has added to my wonderful and happy life?  Time has fully run out on that excuse, for sure.

And now that my biggest and best “excuse” has been shot, I am realizing that I have so many others that aren’t even as valid which are cluttering up my path.  A healthy state of mind is all about how you see and process the world, your life, and your individual challenges.  I’m chock full of other excuses about why things bug me, why my eating gets out of hand, why I’ve gotten back to being further out of shape, and why I can’t seem to manage all of my priorities.  And when I sit and list them all out, things like the darkness and cold of winter, the stress and aftermath of moving, the heat and humidity of summer, the challenge of balancing work and home life, not having “time” in my schedule to exercise even though I have plenty of time to lay around and watch TV, being too tired, not having exactly the right gym or equipment available at home, etc.; they do all just start to sound like exactly what they are.  Excuses.  Lame ones at that.  I am the only person, thing, or event that is consistently getting in my own way, and I hope I am now taking the first of many steps to correct this, in part by realizing that these things are absolutely fully IN my control.  Life is all about what you choose to make of it, and I am very pleased and happy with exactly what I have made of it, where it is located, and who is in it.  As such, the rest is entirely within my control.  There can ALWAYS be a plan to take the steps needed to succeed, and because there are at times minor factors that can pop up to interfere, there can certainly always also be a reliable Plan B waiting in the wings.  I am capable of making these choices, as I have discussed before, and intend to continue to shine a light into the spectre of all the excuses that have been making it harder and seem unattainable. 

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