Pink Called It

I am having myself a craptacular morning. Want to hear about it? I hope so, 'cause I feel like whining about it. Here's the recipe:

Step 1, mess up the one thing that your easily stressed out kid stresses out the most about by forgetting to finish the laundry, and start the day with him having stressey tantrums while the needed pants are in the dryer.
Step 2, get feedback from your boss, to whom you are trying to appear worthy of promotion to an available management position, that you didn't get the issue right on a zoning determination letter you drafted.
Step 3, have the requestor of that letter that you didn't get right invite you and your boss to a meeting to discuss those issues that you told her over the phone prematurely and incorrectly.
Step 4: Be bummed because the one social event I look forward to the most each month is being delayed and everyone sounds really lackluster about it.
Step 5: Have an overload of other work you have to deal with and be low on energy because you ate poorly yesterday and skipped your planned workout.

Stir together, and prepare to belt out the lyrics to Pink's "Blow Me (One Less Kiss). All together now: "I've had a $h*t day!" "I've had a $h*t day!"

Yesterday I had a bunch of more positive stuff to say, including discussing my beloved Biggest Loser 2 night premiere, but I didn't get around to it. I'll try to get back to that later. Thanks for listening.

Two Posts for the Price of One: Weigh In Monday, and Why?!

Weigh-In Monday

I took my “before” pictures yesterday, and I weighed in for my starting weight this morning, and I have debated back and forth about whether to share them with you or not. I’m all about letting it all hang out on this blog, but I’ve come to the conclusion that I just can’t do it (yet.) I will post my weigh-in results each week and apprise of my progress, but I just can’t blurt out the starting number yet, because although I’m comfortable among strangers, I’m mortified to admit it to friends. And I also don’t want to post such horrific pictures to stand alone- I can deal once there’s a work in progress to show alongside. Deal?


Why?!

Why, why, why do the cravings for chocolate and junk food have to be stronger already on THE VERY FIRST DAY you resolve is the start day for doing better? WHY?!!! Is it because I didn’t have the time to go to the store when I had the energy and didn’t have the energy to go to the store when I had the time this weekend? And is it because of that not having gotten to shop for healthy food yet that I didn’t have a filling healthy breakfast to fend off said cravings and now also don’t have much in the way of healthy snack options with me? Why does taking better care of one’s self have to take so much work, and have such difficult repercussions if you don’t do it? Dang that is frustrating! I’m tracking my food, though, even if it is not entirely how I had planned to eat. I cannot afford to fall for the zillionth time into the perpetually recurring nasty cycle of using a slow start, slip up, or other imperfection as an excuse to derail and bail. That was a fun sentence; let’s repeat it again for good measure: I CANNOT afford to fall for the zillionth time into the perpetually recurring nasty cycle of using a slow start, slip up, or other imperfection as an excuse to derail and bail! And I am going to buy groceries on my lunch break, even though it is cold out and I feel tired and lazy. All the groceries I need, not just the bare few minimum things I need for dinner and the boy’s lunches, but truly suck it up and buy the food I need. I made a long list last night. Suck it up.



Oh, and one more bonus thing while I’m at it, and this is just a whiny complaint. Daily life can be such a pain in the ass. I enjoy what I do for a living, but once a week for half a day I am at the mercy of the general public for answering incoming questions. I can say that I have met some interesting people and have been asked some even more interesting (zoning) questions, but it is hectic, annoying, disruptive from other work that needs to get done, and it makes me want to eat. A lot.

First "Long" Saturday "Run"

Ouch.  Slow, painful, and shorter than planned.  That about sums up my first Saturday morning "long run".  You know, as in any training program, you typically have one long run scheduled a week, and mine is generally going to be on Saturday mornings.  And boy is it going to be a long while before it is either a run, or anywhere close  to long, but I've gotta start somewhere!  I just wish it didn't hurt so much, my ankles are incredibly sore and tight.  But at least my back didn't join the party like it did on my short painful lunchtime walk this week with my turbo-charged boss.  Anyhoo, I planned a long workout, and banged out the best one I could muster.  3 miles, 52 minutes.  Ugh, but it is still good enough and a solid calorie burn!

Hellooooooo, 2013.

Welcome. So nice to see you! FYI, I wasn’t particularly impressed with your predecessor, 2012. Don’t get me wrong, nothing BAD happened in my life (frantically knocking on wood!) My family and friends and health are all intact, my job and finances have remained stable, I didn’t have to deal with any major life changes in the past year, and all is generally well. We even took a spectacular, not-many-times-in-a-lifetime vacation to Hawaii in the spring, which was outstanding! But other than that, over the past year, the day-to-day was moderately blah. Just plodding along, trying to manage obligations, getting overloaded, overstressed, and overtired easily, working to get through the next day/thing/deadline, and as a result? My personal care, weight, and fitness have continued to stink it up more than ever. I keep reaching all-time weight highs, only to later reach another new one. It’s madness! Sheer, psychotic, horrendous madness. Simple, daily things like climbing stairs, carrying things, bending over, etc. have gotten progressively more uncomfortable as my waistline expands. I keep buying bigger, more “camoflagey” clothes, and it’s not working, I truly look heavy now. I avoid being in pictures as much as possible. I am always tired, except when I first wake up, IF I got enough sleep, which I rarely have the discipline to do. As a result of being tired and stressed a lot I am also cranky a lot, which is not good for me or the family. In a nutshell, I am in overweight hell, and it feeds on itself at an alarming rate. Being unfit and overweight makes one tired and lazy (and cranky), and being tired and lazy makes one progressively less fit (and cranky). Looking and feeling terrible makes one eat excessively, and eating excessively makes one look and feel terrible (and cranky!)



2013, please be as different as I intend you to be, I have to break this cycle for my own sanity. Brain, please cooperate as I reshape your way of thinking about food, and as I try to trick you into progressively increasing motivation for moving more. Success, please be generous. Failure, please be gentle and fleeting. Let’s do this.

Yea, still here.

Hi.  Yea, I know...  The unfortunate news is, I did not lose any weight in 2012.  In fact, I gained a little bit more, and I think I am right now less fit than ever.  Not a ton of weight, but more is more regardless.  This is not a good thing.  However, I am not going to post manifestos about restarting, and the coming of a new year, and how "this time is really it" and all that.  I've been chatting with myself (inside my head, not out loud) about it, but I've written all that enough times, I'll spare you it again.  There is no need.  Skinny Cat is still "to be".  Hopefully in the coming year you will be reading about workouts, and successful food days, and progress.  Hopefully.

A Very Long Pause...

Yea, I know, I've been away from writing.  And no, I'm not so busy losing weight that I didn't have time to post, haha, I wish.  Just took a pause in the chatter about it until I was ready to give it another legitimate go.  I'm good, all is well with me and mine, just not focused on that aspect of life at the moment.  But I need to be.  Soon.  Almost there.  Wait for it.  Stand by.  Any second now...

Shark Week Sucks

Ok, so I've been kicking ass here.  Working out weekly with a trainer and additionally on my own other days, counting calories, making sure I'm eating the right things, burning enough by staying active, etc.  And to show for it I am (was?) 6 pounds down.

Now, this week has been a bit of a hiccup.  1) I have been more tired, both body and sleep wise.  2) It was a weird, busy week.  3) I had to endure dental torture, which opens up my deepest, darkest terrors to deal with.  And last, but most certainly not least, 4) It's the week before my cycle starts up.  I know, I know, EXCUSE, it truly is, and a lame one at that.  Many, many months I don't let it get too much the better of me, others it really kicks my ass.  Like this one.  Historically, we've begun to refer to this week as "Shark Week", because it can become an uncontrolled feeding frenzy.

Long story short, I took a break, but I am back on the horse tomorrow, and I don't think it was too much of a setback.  As long as it doesn't continue.  Hopefully my trainer will beat it out of me this morning.  (Not a good sign that I'm up so late, though!!!)